If you were able to know for certain when you will meet your soul mate, would you want to know? In Oona O’Leary’s (Emma Caulfield) world, a special chip has been created that calculates the time it will take for a person to meet their soul mate, provided the partner has purchased their own timer. Unfortunately for Oona, her “one” has not done that yet.


TiMER focuses on Oona’s problems finding someone that she truly loves and her devout faith in the abilities of the timer. We also meet her family and her source of newfound energy, Mikey (John Patrick Amedori). Her stepsister, Steph Depaul (Michelle Borth), has a timer, but is doomed to wait thousands of days to meet him/her. So to cope, Steph has meaningless relationships to provide entertainment until her person shows up. She and Oona are impossibly close friends, but have differing views on how much stock should be given to these timers. No one compares to their mother, who found her “one” only after divorcing and purchasing her timer. Now, she pushes for the power of the timer more than anyone else. Oona ends up trying Steph’s style with Mikey, but finds that it is not for her and develops a bond with him.

TiMER is about finding true love and nothing else. The questions brought up consist mainly of thoughts about the pros and cons of dating without knowing the outcome. Some, like Mikey and Steph’s friend, Dan [Desmond Harrington, (great seeing him as someone other than Quinn on Dexter)], feel that the joy of dating and finding someone naturally outweighs the dullness of knowing the result and simply waiting. It is made clear that the timer is a big city contraption and not necessarily accessible to most of the country, which adds a special elitist element to the device, but nothing influential.

There is nothing specifically noteworthy about the film. It is essentially mediocre in every way. The love story is bland, the relationships are realistic, but somewhat to a fault, and there is little substance to it. The relationships between characters progress as they would in reality, but almost so realistically that they become boring and mundane. Mikey is actually a pretty interesting character, but is squashed by the focus on Oona and her inability to take control of her own life instead of relying on the timer. He serves as her youthful energy, revitalizing her when she was beginning to give up hope.

The interesting side story that is given no chance to blossom is that of Jesse (younger brother of Steph and Oona) and Soledad (daughter of the housekeeper), the high school freshmen forced into love by their timers going off almost immediately after insertion. I found it much more interesting to see kids deal with the pressure that comes with finding a soul mate, instead of an impatient woman focusing too much on social pressure.

All in all, the film moves at a fairly steady, albeit slow, pace that never picks up beyond mildly entertaining. If you’re someone who can handle listening to love conversations for over an hour and a half, then you will probably like TiMER a lot. Otherwise, you’ll be bored for almost the whole thing.

    • Tran
    • April 24th, 2012

    This movie deserves so much more than a C!

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